Resolution 2023 — Read a book every month, April 2023.

The 10 Kidmandments – Ten Principles for Raising Successful Children by Jeffrey B. Oddo.

In the journey of self-improvement, I realised I am also a mum and maybe I should read up on being a good parent since I’ve been out frequently to hustle nowadays.

This is a thin book but I read it twice in an attempt to retain more information.

1. Life’s Purpose – Good parents hope their kids figure out on their own. Great parents understand what makes their lives rich and complete and teach these skills to their children.

What is my purpose in life? Good question. My purpose in life now is to raise my kid well, hence I am reading this book to learn. Lol.

2. Life’s Paths – Paths are those roles we play in life to achieve “success”. Teach and expose our kids how paths help them achieve their purposes and it is a necessary step for them to develop their independence and feel like they are in control of their own lives.

As a parent, we should be focused on helping them find something they love and have the potential skills to do it well.

3. Positive Mental Attitude – Parents are the first coaches of a child. Great coaches motivate others to want to be better. Children who grow up with positive mental attitudes radiates contagious positive energy, believe anything is possible and appreciative of all gifts they have been given.

After all, being able to bring yourself back up is a skill and it should be encouraged since young to build resilience. Don’t keep whining and blame the whole world for bad stuff that came your way.

4. Living in the Present – Lead by example by letting go of negative energy and words from the past, enjoy the moment and look forward to what the future may bring.

I realised my mum has been sharing about how tough life was, how boys were preferred over girls in her generation and how hard she worked and how little my dad did to help. Every time I visit her, I felt my energy depleting. It is annoying and I vow not to keep on repeating bad events. I don’t want to be a grumpy old woman in my child and even grandchildren’s eyes.

5. Relationship / Communication Skills – One key fact about communication is that we cannot NOT communicate. Presence, absence, silence, words, gestures and attitudes are all forms of communication.

Build wonderful lasting relationships with people they love through communication even though the way we communicate may not necessarily be effective or constructive; but we are communicating, nonetheless.

6. Love to Learn – Finding sustainable joy in life is so much easier when we live a life of ongoing learning. Learning has the power to transform us mentally, spiritually, psychologically and physically.

As the saying goes, “Change is the only constant.” So is learning to adapt. Keep it up.

7. The Rs: Rules, Respect and Repercussions – Kids are more likely to experience problems if these are not established. Consistent communicate what is expected early and often. Clearly knowing what is expected helps children anticipate consequences and strategise success.

8. Health – Create awareness that good health should consider our minds, bodies and spirits working together. If we are not good roles models by living healthy lives, we have little rights to expect our kids to be healthy adults. Hence, make constant efforts to be healthy. It will stick with kids for the rest of their lives.

A couple of missed healthy meals early on in life is better than a lifetime of bad eating habits. Do not cave in to offering sweets and soda. I fail terribly in this.

9. Money and Materialism – Great parents teach their children to respect money at a very early age. Not so good parents give their kids everything they want. I must say I have great parents. So, sorry my boy. I am sending you to do part time jobs during your school holidays.

10. Faith, Religion and Spirituality – True faith is believing in things we cannot perceive through the five senses, but which can be felt through the sixth sense: intuition.

I think it is a good way to teach kids to believe in a higher power so they will think twice about doing bad stuff because “somebody is watching”.

After reading this book, I felt that it not only benefited me in the ways to raise my child. The 10 Kidmandments is applicable to adults as well. It is probably not too late to apply.