Category Archives: Housing

Adult, complain, Housing, Investment, life, Money, Relationship, Thoughts, Work

Little Tweaks

Besides endless work and school, I have been trying to coordinate everything to get the new place ready.

Oh gosh, refinancing is one area to save money since interest rates are down. Fixed or floating is the debate with neighbours but the hassle is providing documentations and the to and fro emails with the mortgage banker. It is ok. Think of how much money we can save after doing this.

Although minimal renovation is required but there are other stuff that needs to be done. Defects check, consultation with fengshui master, contractor and liaising with the management office etc. Necessary but money sucking services.

At the rate the money goes, I’m not earning fast enough. Buy Toto and 4D! 有买有希望。Since I started betting online on Singapore pools app, I strike $20 to $50 a total of eight times. I don’t need eight times. Can let me just strike a big amount for the lottery once? 一次就好。

Tough luck.

Crypto is probably a better bet but I did not buy a lot and did not make a lot because I am cautious. Just afraid that it goes up after I sell, down after I buy. Have some patience! Hold on to them and not panic sell for goodness sake!

Even since I got increasingly frustrated with work, I’ve been looking through LinkedIn and applying for jobs actively again.

Are these jobs real? Why still no calls back? I refused to believe it is due to age because my course mates who changed jobs are older than me.

I told myself to focus on self development and I stopped looking for new jobs for a while to concentrate on my studies, but I realised many of my course mates did not stop looking and many of them changed jobs while doing the course.

With family, with kids, with studies and busier work than me. How did they find the time and energy?

Realisation — Other people and the world does not stop just because I decided to. They can happen concurrently.

Less time on social media, short films and shopping on live streams and focus.

Am I crazy trying to the same thing over and over and waiting for a miracle to happen?

I am still making adjustments here and there. Tweaks in mindset is bringing me through this period. What else do I have to tweak to get it right?

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Adult, Culture, Housing, life, Money, Relationship, Work

Burnout: The Body Keeps Score


My body has a new way of communicating with me lately, and it is not subtle. A throat that is constantly scratchy, a head that pounds, a nose that is either blocked or running, and a deep ache that no amount of massage seemed to be able to alleviate. It is telling me it has reached its limit.


I considered myself a person who thrives under pressure. However, that pressure has recently become an overwhelming burden of responsibilities, leaving no time for rest.


At work, I’ve been assigned complex new programs, and on top of that, I am taking over from a colleague who could not handle a single complex client. I initially thought I was stepping into a leadership position, but it turns out I am merely a secondary support. There is no recognition, no project leadership—just the responsibility of resolving issues when they arise. It is a frustrating and thankless role.


My real estate side business seemed to be getting more referrals, which I am incredibly thankful for. However, with each new client, there is more time to invest and better service to provide. I cannot provide substandard service when people have entrusted me with their family and friends.


Then there is my events management business. I was a “sleeping partner,” trusting my business partner to handle operations. I only stepped in to host events when needed and reinvested my earnings back into the company. So you can imagine my shock when I discovered the company was operating at a loss. A loss? With sponsors?

Now I must intervene and correct the situation, cutting unprofitable activities and strategizing a new course. My money does not grow on trees, so I have no choice but to take charge.


In addition to all this, I am trying to finish my course. Initially I thought it would be a great way to network, but most opportunities are with small to medium-sized enterprises. After years in a large corporations, I do not believe it is the right fit for me.


With a new mortgage to pay and a new home to furnish, quitting my day job is not an option. I am in this cycle: five days of work, a full day of classes, a family day, and then it all begins again.

I try to take care of myself by taking my vitamins and exercise regularly but all I truly want to do is lie down and sleep without any disturbances.


I know I am not alone in feeling this way. There are so many people who are managing multiple jobs, side businesses, family obligations, and personal goals as well.

“Listen to your body,” they say. They send us signals, and eventually, they will fail if we do not listen.

We have also been told to push ourselves to the limit. Stopping everytime there is a hiccup hinders progress.


My new challenge is this: how do I find a moment to breathe when it feels like I am drowning? Maybe I work better with pressure.

How do I tell myself it is acceptable to slow down when the world constantly urges me to speed up? I tend to become lazy when I take breaks and it gets harder to restart.

Maybe I brought all these upon myself and I deserved it.

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Adult, complain, Culture, Housing, Money, Relationship

Car Problem

Recently, the husband and I have been trying to consolidate cash to get ready for our new place.

Big item to get rid of is one of the cars. His, because it fetches a higher price.

He took mine and I have none. I am back to public transport and I don’t quite enjoy it.

The agreed timeline is, until we get a new mortgage loan, renovation and move in. Then, we can work out our finances for a new car. It looks like it is only possible at then end of the year.

Still, he kept shopping around for a new one and even made me visit showrooms after he did to look for a seven seater. We are a family of three. Four with helper.

He said we can bring my parents for a weekend trip or medical appointments. We really don’t need to and my parents do not expect that from us. In fact, they rejected the idea fiercely.

“It is also easier to get favours from people at work,” he said. Hence, I think my parents was just an excuse.

Also, he seemed to want to take over his extended family side of the responsibility to chauffeur his relatives around during festive seasons too. Not that I mind but I don’t like it when he complains after that.

Zero down payment or whatever gimmick car dealer uses, one new car is more expensive than two. Ultimately, my car will go but it does not make any financial sense to me at all.

No way you are using money meant for the new home to boost your ego with a car.

I was irritated because I find it a waste of people’s time and also my time to keep looking around at the same thing with no intention to buy now. I will be cursing and swearing if I am the salesperson.

You must have an end goal in doing something and deserve one right slap if you think it is okay to waste other people’s time like that.

We got into a heated argument because I wanted to go shop for my son’s swimwear as he has outgrown his and swimming lessons is only a few days away but the husband made us visit a showroom with him instead.

I burst.

I mean, please prioritise the one with nearer date. He is not going to commit to a new car anytime soon. By the time we are done, it is late. Shops are closed and we have to head back to feed a hungry child.

Still no new swim wear.

I snapped at him. He seemed to think I have free time to go shopping since I get to work from home. Traveling without my own car has become quite a hassle.

The next day, we found out that shops that sells swimwear near our place closed down and we have to travel elsewhere to get it.

At this point I was in a constant outburst.

He insisted he is committed since he sold his car and was unhappy why I did not understand his depressed mood for giving up his precious and blamed me for it. He did not understand why I did not appreciate him sacrificing his ride.

I told him because he drove the car to get happy ending and it makes me upset every time I had to sit in it. He should have gotten rid of it long ago.

Dead silence.

Then, I told him to go ahead and get his own car. I will keep mine.

As of today, we only have our eight year old Volkswagen Golf and I only hear the occasional “this is a nice car” comment but no more car showroom visits. Thankfully.

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